RACE REPORT!! Caledonia Etape 2010

The world of Scientific Research has taken a downturn today as Dawn as been creating this superb race report as opposed to finding a cure for life threatening diseases. Good job she hardly ever races!! Here goes.......

I had entered the Caledonia Etape last year and despite all the carpet tack debarcle I thought it was well organised and an absolutely stunning route. So in December I entered the Etape again – but I have to admit it was also to do with giving a two finger salute to the dude that dropped the tacks.

As the event got closer my heart wasn’t really in it. It didn’t seem the same challenge to me as it did last year. After being dragged around Lanzarote in March by EKRC and a number of road rides since I knew I could cover the distance which I couldn’t have said this time last year! We turned up on Saturday afternoon in Pitlochry which was a stunning day and registered with 4000 people. Registration was open all day so there was no Q’s and collected my goodie bag consisting of pamphlet’s, boys addidas shower gel (free to a good home) and energy bars etc. Not quite the patch on last years goodie bag when we got Adidas toilet and kit bags. Ho Hum. Maybe the extra 1500 people in the race since last year stretched the goodie bag budget a bit more.

The problem with getting up there early is that there is a lack of things to do to keep you occupied and …out the pubs….. Dinner and 4 pints later my Dad and I toddled off to our twin room. Dad can be a bit prone to snoring so I equipped myself with pillow over my head and prayed I fell asleep before he did. I needn’t have worried about the noise my dad was making. It looks like the Pitlochy Backpackers which is fantastic budget accommodation and I highly recommend to anyone except it also sits beside what appears to be the local Saturday nightlife for the “young ones” Q the screaming the loud talking and the shouting till about 3am. After which I then had to deal with my Dads snoring. So 4 pints and no sleep. Great race preparation.

Day of race. Felt pants. Tired, cranky and couldn’t be bothered. Force fed myself with cereal and banana at 630am. Our start time of 738am was exactly that. Very well organised keeping an exact schedule when you’re trying to sort out 4000 competitors is impressive. And we were off, 5 mins in my legs still hadn’t warmed up. Up to Queens View they still felt no better, perhaps even worse? First feed station passed, I had plans on pulling up a chair and tucking in a napkin as I remember the feed stations were excellent last year but Gen warned me that was not what it was all about this year. So I passed the first feed station with my tongue hanging out and rubber necking trying to see what delights were on offer. Are you proud of me Genevieve?

At 35miles I was 2hrs 10mins. Which isn’t too bad but I felt awful. Then twang, a spoke on the non-drive side of my rear wheel went. Trying not to make a huge deal about it I tried to laugh it off by remembering MM’s comment that I put too much power through the wheels … as if! Second feed station – PASSED! (I bet Colin is now impressed …) The Schiehallion climb was next. King of the mountains time trial up a hill. Timing mats laid on the entrance to the hill and exit at the top. I took my time, as I do normally – couldn’t even be bothered getting out the saddle so I just grinded away. 50miles reached and the top of the hill loomed. Stopped in at the feed station. It was now a matter of life and death Gen I had to. Took a ZipVit gel and filled up my water. The gel has caffeine equivalent of 2.5 cans of red bull and some other carb thingy’s. Down the hill – onto the flat and the loop into Fortingall. I don’t know what the hell was in that gel but OMG! I was flyin – I passed loadsa people. Felt amazing, beginning to think that I should have had a few gel’s for breakfast. I chain ganged about 6 guys for 10-15mins who then started to slow on a hill – I WAS OUT THE SADDLE AND OVERTOOK THE LOT OF THEM IN ONE GO! I felt like I was Cole Trickle in Days of Thunder, when he says Feck it and puts his foot to the accelerator! The next 25 miles I hammered it thinking I could do this in less than five hours if I just keep it going. I remembered the last feed station and started panicking about the come down I might have from the gel so reckoned I better pop another one, I felt like a junkie after a fix. Another gel, and caffeine equivalent of now 5 cans of red bull sloshing around inside me. I spotted Graeme Robb with his ATHelite tri top on and said hello but I was so desperate to beat 5hrs at this point that I headed off again – sorry for not being conversational Graeme! The long headwind straight for about 15 miles ish I tried to draft a few people but in the end I overtook them and did majority of the whole flat headwind straight out on my todd. I attempted to jump on a group of guys that were doing a fair ton but when they noticed I was behind them they picked up and left me … charming!

The last few miles are evil with short sharp steep hill sections and the last mile a little hill into Pitlochry. I made it. 4hrs 56mins official time. Very chuffed. Dad came in 15mins later. We lost each other on the Schiehallion hill. Quite chuffed riding time somewhere in regions of about 4hrs 40mins. Needless to say I went to the stand and bought 10 gels for future events. I normally eat jelly babies and banana’s over fancy gels and sports nutrition but I have now been converted!

Very well organised and challenging scenic route of 81 miles and 1950m of ascent. Highly recommended. Especially the gels at the feed station.